Thelma (GOP) & Louise (DNC)
Driving America Over the Cliff
Whenever someone asks me to explain American politics, I ask them, “Have you ever seen the 1991 movie Thelma and Louise?" Typically, the answer is, "No."
Then, I briefly explain this movie is about two unhappily married Arkansas women on a “girls-only” vacation. They unintentionally commit a series of serious crimes while driving their turquoise 1966 Ford Thunderbird convertible on a road trip through Arkansas, Oklahoma, New Mexico, and Arizona. The movie ends with the two women being chased by scores of police cars to the edge of the Grand Canyon. When cornered, the two women decide they have had enough of their miserable lives and drive the T-bird over the canyon cliff.
The movie ends with Thelma and Louise flying off the cliff.
We don’t know:
How long it took for the car to hit the canyon floor?
Did either Thelma or Louise survive?
If either or both survived, how badly were they hurt?
Did they recover?
If they recovered, were they permanently crippled?
At this point, I am usually asked what this movie has to do with American politics.
My answer is, "Well, imagine that . . .
“Thelma represents the Republican Party and Louise represents the Democratic Party. Thelma and Louise are both sitting in the front seat. Louise (DNC) is driving. She is driving at the posted speed limit, 60 mph.
For this analogy, suppose a young romantic hitch-hiking couple is riding in the back seat. The couple represents the American people. The T-bird transporting them represents the United States Federal Government. The criminal acts Thelma and Louise inadvertently commit are analogous to climate change, AI, and other existential issues confronting America and the planet Earth. The law enforcement agencies chasing them represent America's global allies and competitors, trying to reason with America on the best ways to confront the existential crises they all face.
As Louise (DNC) drives towards "her" destination, Thelma (GOP) argues with Louise about their destination and how best to get there. Meanwhile, the young couple are not paying attention to who is driving or where they are going. They are too busy talking, snuggling, kissing, sharing a beer, and feeling each other up under a warm blanket — the convertible's top is down, and it's chilly riding in the back seat.
This car never stops. But periodically — every 4 hours — Thelma (GOP) and Louise (DNC) toss a coin to see who will drive for the next 4 hours.
Whenever there is a change of drivers, the car swerves and sometimes careens off the road as Thelma and Louise crawl over each other to change drivers.
Somehow, they manage to keep the car from crashing. The couple in the back seat feels the swerving and skidding during these driver changes, but they are too busy having fun to pay much attention.
Thelma (GOP) won the recent coin toss and is now driving; she accelerates to 90 mph. Louise (DNC) argues with Thelma about her speeding, their destination, and how best to get there.
Eventually, the Law enforcement agencies close in and implore Thelma and Louise to surrender to save themselves and their passengers.
Thelma (GOP) and Louise (DNC) reject law enforcement’s entreaties to surrender, say, “fuck it”, and hold hands as Thelma (GOP) drives the car and its passengers (i.e. America) over the cliff."
The points of this analogy are:
America and humanity are confronting numerous existential crises.
Our politicians continue to plow straight ahead towards the canyon cliff.
It doesn't matter whether Democrats or Republicans are governing. The only difference between them is the speed at which their policies and actions drive Us towards the cliff.
Most of Us are like the amorous couple riding in the back seat — ignorant, uneducated, or just not paying attention.
We may already have driven off the canyon cliff.
If we have already careened off the cliff, how long will it take before Our T-bird crashes onto the canyon floor?
Can the damage done to America be repaired?
How many Americans, if any, will survive the impact?